Watching Melissa on DANCING WITH THE STARS got me to thinking. 

After my recent post on how TV can numb your life  and make you anxious about the world and render you feeling helpless to do anything about it—–I decided to jump over the obvious and look for whatever lessons might be hiding in plain sight. 

Want something that you can always put in your truth bucket?  Here it is:  When you commit to finding the lessons and blessings, they are everywhere, every day.  Every person, every event, every moment, every frustration, is a chance for an AH-HA.  Setting your intention on finding those AH-HA’s—what’s there for you, alone,  to learn—will automatically create a sense of purpose that will serve you immediately—-even when you don’t have the perfect job or mate or weight.  It will make what might seem mundane—–meaningful. The message is always there, waiting for us.

So, let’s take Melissa.  She was originally on THE BACHELOR as one of the “beauties” to be swept off her feet into a proposal of marriage.  Forget the improbability of finding a life time of true romance in 6 weeks, while worrying about camera angles and commercial breaks.   Melissa was  Bachelor-What’s-His-Name’s ultimate choice on last season’s show.  But, between the time the show was shot and the time it finally hit the air—-the Bachelor had gotten the jitters about chosing her.  In a ratings swell, he dumped her for another—on national television.  Splat.

Poor Melissa.  She sat in the back of the limousine, as she was whisked back to her little life, bemoaning the fact that she was “always the one, dumped”.  As a matter of fact, she wailed, in her last 4 relationships, she was always the one who “got the axe.”  Kleenenexes, across the country, were being soaked, for her.

Then, in a twist of the ankle of fate, Melissa was asked to be on another, even more popular reality show—-DANCING WITH THE STARS—-where she is currently one of the darlings of the audience.  She has also proven to be quite an accomplished dancer and performer, having studied dance as a child and having been a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader.

Time out.   This is where we can put ourselves in her shoes.  How often do we say we want something……when, in reality……there is something else we really want MORE?  How often to do we run after a superficial truth, like wanting to be married, or getting that degree,  when there is actually something deeper that we need to address? 

If something is not working in our lives—something that we have made multiple runs at—-could it be there is something MORE IMPORTANT that we are afraid to lay claim to?  Something else, deeper and more fulfilling that “a little bird” is trying to tell us?

Back to Melissa.  I believe she was the “dumpee….again” because what she has really wanted, all her life, was be to famous—to be a star, to be America’s darling—MORE than being someone’s girlfriend or wife.   She has pursued the limelight most of her life.  That’s not a judgment.  It’s just an IS.  Her calling may have been to be on stage as an entertainer.   

Here’s another point.  What if our deepest desires make us feel silly or superficial or rock the boat of our current image, too much?  I guarantee you—those deepest desires will not go away by pushing them down.  They will come out sideways, looking like your Achilles heel, instead, if you don’t honor them.  These deepest desires ARE our gifts.  They must receive our attention.  It is an imperative.  If we ignore our deepest calling,  our God given essential nature and talents—-to pursue instead, what appears to be “the right thing” we will never experience true joy and peace in our lives . Our unexpressed talents will drive us to drink.  We will age before our time.  We will know much more about un-ease and disease.  No matter how much we try to trick ourselves, we know……..you know……..what I am talking about.

Back to Melissa’s Message……………Watching her path may shed some clues to the stepping stones in our lives.

Melissa started out as a dancer.  You usually don’t pursue dancing to confine your high kicks to your living room.  She became a Dallas Cowboy’s Cheerleader.  These cheerleaders put in hundreds of hours of practice and physical training—not to mention a rigorous diet and attention to every aspect of their physical appearance.  Did you know they make less than $100 per game for all that effort?  Unless, they are indepentedly wealthy, they all have to have full time jobs in addition to their grueling schedules as cheerleaders.  

Then, she tried out for THE BACHELOR.  That’s not something a person would do, whose sole purpose in life is really to meet MR. RIGHT.  The agenda for anyone on these reality shows is to become widely recognized.  In Melissa’s case, it was extremely effective.  Her name became known throughout the country, not to mention the national rally around her demise as his ultimate choice.   Now, on DANCING WITH THE STARS, her skills and appearance are catapulting her into an even brighter spotlight.   She is becoming known for her abilities to dance and  entertain us, making us feel good, not only in the sheer coordination of the routines and costumes but to see the “underdog come out ahead”!   It is impossible not to see and feel the joy, SHE is feeling in this new found role.   FAME & FORTUNE.   She is on her way.  And, good for her.  This is where she was always meant to be.  Her heart of hearts is getting its full expression.  And, she will be rewarded for it.  Nobody’s date.  No hiding out in the role of “mate”.

She has finally gotten things in the right order for her life, no one else’s.   Now, she will probably go on and find the love of her life……..because she has not only, found, but also is honoring and expressing…….her deepest truth.

What is true……..for you?